Why happy couples don’t talk about their relationship on social media

You’re not the only one who notices that specific couple on social media, their profile pictures are selfies of them smiling together, and their statuses are inside jokes or relationship goals.

But, when you actually spend time with them, you wonder why they’re really together. It is not a rule, but in general, when you are one of those happy couples, the last thing you plan to do is expose your happiness on the networks.

Unlike their public facade, behind closed doors, this couple is always arguing about everything from homework to finances, and they seem on the verge of breaking up.

It gets so tedious that you long for the days when social media status was just a shout out on your profile. Unfortunately, social media has evolved to become a part of our everyday lives, which includes sharing too much information about our relationships.

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The fact is that genuinely happy couples don’t have to brag. In fact, they barely discuss their relationship on social media. Here are 8 reasons overposting couples may not be coping as well as they appear.

  1. They convince others to convince themselves
    When two people constantly post jokes, confess their love or share photos of themselves doing fun and romantic activities, it is a strategy to convince everyone else that they are in a happy and healthy relationship, which is really just a way of fooling themselves themselves so that they believe they are in a happy and healthy relationship.

Oftentimes, the people who post a lot more on social media are the ones who seek validation of their relationship from other people.

Likes and comments can be so valuable that when someone is really going through a rough patch, that’s where they feed off of.

  1. Those who post the most are more likely to be psychopaths and narcissists
    A survey of 800 men between the ages of 18 and 40 found that “ narcissism and psychopathy predicted the number of selfies posted, while narcissism and self-objectification predicted editing photos of oneself posted ” on social media.

Another study found that posting, tagging, and commenting on Facebook are often associated with narcissism in both men and women.

In short, the more often you publicize or engage on social media, the more likely you are to be a narcissist or, worse, a psychopath. And in case you’re wondering, narcissists make very bad relationship partners.

  1. When you’re happy, you don’t get distracted by social media
    There will be many occasions when you will share a status or a couple of photos of you and your partner. Happy couples, however, are busy enjoying each other’s company in the present. This means they wo n’t stop enjoying each other’s company just to post a status or take a selfie.

That’s why you’ll see this couple post a collage of their recent trip after they get home. They were too concerned with having fun to post photos.

  1. Couples who post a lot tend to be insecure.
    After surveying more than 100 couples, researchers at Northwestern University found that those who posted most often on social media about their partner felt genuinely insecure in their relationship.
  2. Couples are better off when they keep arguments offline.
    Have you ever been in the presence of a couple who is fighting ? It’s awkward, to say the least. Now imagine that fight being played out for the whole world to see on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or YouTube.

Instead of filming and uploading a video full of rage and profanity, for example, the argument should be discussed privately between the couple. You don’t need to wash your dirty clothes in front of all your friends, family, co-workers, or even clients.

  1. Those who post a lot on social media trust that their relationship will make them happy.
    Researchers at Albright University call this relationship contingent self-esteem ( RCSE ). It’s described as ” an unhealthy form of self-esteem that depends on how well your relationship is working. ” These people use social media to brag about their relationship, make others jealous, or even spy on their partner.

” These results suggest that those on RCSE feel a need to show others, their partners, and perhaps themselves that their relationship is ‘ okay, ‘” said Albright assistant professor of psychology Gwendolyn Seidman.

  1. Happy couples have nothing to prove
    Really happy couples don’t need social media validation to prove how happy they are. They do not need to show off, make others envious, or keep an eye on their partner.
  2. People who stay off Facebook are happier
    The Danish Happiness Research Institute wanted to know what would happen if people left Facebook for a week. So, they conducted an experiment involving 1,095 people.

“After a week without Facebook, the treatment group reported a significantly higher level of life satisfaction”, the researchers stated.

Before the experiment, the volunteers were asked to rate their lives on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the happiest. The ” no Facebook ” group increased from an average of 7. 75 / 10 to 8. 12 / 10, while the group that continued to use Facebook decreased from 7. 67 / 10 to 7. 56 / 10.

The researchers also found that frequent Facebook users were more likely to feel angry ( 20% vs. 12% ), depressed ( 33% vs. 22% ), and worried ( 54% vs. 41% ).

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In reality, it really shouldn’t matter much what the research says. It matters what you think and feel. However, the comments and findings of professionals can be something like, to at least take a look. And if you feel like a colleague or friend has a ” social media ” problem, you might want to take a closer look.

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